UNCONVENTIONAL WORLD RECORDS

At least for World Cup 2010, don’t even think of watching matches in Somalia.

If you’re caught by Islamist militants, you’d be lucky to escape with mere flogging in public.

Instead of watching matches, these gangs spend their time patrolling around looking for people to catch red-handed in front of a TV.

Just a few days ago, they killed 2 people caught watching a game in the privacy of their home.

Yes, their World Cup fever is slightly different.

Sheikh Mohamed Abdi Aros, of Hizbul-Islam, one of the militant groups was quoted to have said:

We are warning all the youth of Somalia not to dare watch these World Cup matches. It is a waste of money and time and they will not benefit anything, not even get any experience by watching mad men jumping up and down.

Yes, folks, Mr Abdi Aros thinks Lionel Messi is a lunatic and Cristiano Ronaldo is basically a monkey in disguise.

Somali football fans are probably all squinty eyed, for they have one eye on the TV, and another on the door, while huddled under a massage table cart just in case them enforcers come crashing in.

Source
The BBC, 14 June 2010

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IMHO, there are 2 contenders, both, perhaps unsurprisingly were by the Brazilians. And both of them have been scored so long ago that football fans old enough to have seen them live might be users of wrinkle creams now.

In the 1970 final, with 5 minutes to go, Carlos Alberto scored Brazil’s fourth and final goal against Italy. Eight Brazilians in all were involved, representing The Beautiful Game at its level best. It started with Tostão from just outside Brazil’s penalty box, who then ran the entire length of the field into Italy’s penalty box, without ever touching the ball again. Meanwhile, Clodoaldo eluded 4 Italians while still in his own half, passed to Rivelino, who in turn passed to Jairzinho on the left, who then pushed inside and gave the ball to Pelé, who then did what’s been called the chess player’s move, as he waited calmly for the perfect moment before rolling it into the path of Carlos Alberto, who’d onrushed all the way from right back. His thundering shot was simply unstoppable – keeper Enrico Albertosi did not even manage to get a hand to it.

Then, in the 1958 World Cup final, Pele, then only 17 years old, scored two goals, both in the second half. The first is probably the greatest goal ever scored in a final, where he lobbed the ball over Bengt Gustavsson, and followed that up with a pinpoint volley. And more than 50 years later, Pele’s records are still unbroken: the youngest to ever play in a World Cup final, the youngest to ever score in a World Cup final and of course the youngest to ever win a World Cup. Pele himself was quoted to have said that this was the sweetest victory of his glittering career.

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Definitely out, these guys became spectators like the rest of us, probably watched them matches in one of those used motorhomes parked by the beach somewhere…

Rio Ferdinand (England): 4 June 2010: knee ligament injury during training.
Nani (Portugal): 8 June 2010: shoulder injury
Michael Ballack (Germany): 15 May 2010: ankle injury
Mikel John Obi (Nigeria): 5 June 2010: knee/ankle injury
Michael Essien (Ghana): 27 May 2010: knee injury

Was injured, but still ended up playing:

Didier Drogba (Ivory Coast): 4 June: fractured elbow
Arjen Robben (Holland): 4 June: hamstring injury

Did this guy play?

Andrea Pirlo (Italy): available June 24 in match vs Slovakia

Earlier:

March 2010: David Beckham (England): Achilles tendon injury.
October 2009: Oguchi Onyewu (USA): torn patellar tendon on knee.

Popularity: unranked [?]

Updated 4 December 2011

Socrates has died of an illness. He was 57.

His most memorable goal is probably the following thunderbolt, which was the equaliser during the match against the USSR in the 1982 World Cup:

RIP

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9 June 2010

Socrates Brasileiro Sampaio de Souza Vieira de Oliveira, simply Socrates to the world (born 1954) of Brazil was one of the best midfielders in the history of football and probably the most rugged footballer of the Cold War era. He captained Brazil in the 1982 World Cup, still considered one of the best sides in history, and surely the best Brazilian side never to win the World Cup.

In March 2004, Pele named him one of the Top 125 Living Footballers. World Soccer has included him in its list of the 100 best footballers in history.

Nothing out of ordinary right? Other footballers have achieved even greater stuff on the field.

But consider this: while still playing professionally for Botafogo at club level in the 1970s, where he made 57 appearances and scored 24 goals, he studied at, and graduated with a medical degree from the Faculdade de Medicina de Ribeirao Preto.

That means he was already a medical doctor while playing in the 1982 and 1986 World Cups.

He then went on to earn (not honorary) a PhD in philosophy.

On top of all that, he was also a heavy drinker and smoker. Yes, while still a player at the highest level. Apparently, he’s still doing both now.

How the heck did he manage to do all that, one would ask? Did his mother gobble up prodigious amounts of prenatal vitamins?!

He now practises sports medicine in his home town of Ribeirao Preto, Brazil.

Popularity: 1% [?]

To me, to be considered the greatest international striker in football, one must fulfill the following conditions:

- must have played for a top footballing nation
- must have scored more goals than the number of caps received; the greater the difference, the better
- plus point: have won the World Cup
- plus point: have scored many goals during (a) World Cup tournament(s)

If based on numbers alone, Niels Poul “Tist” Nielsen (1891 – 1962) of Denmark should be the greatest international goalscoring machine who ever lived.

He played 38 times for his country, yet scored 52 goals, averaging an astounding 1.37 goals a match. However, he lived before the era of professionals and mondials. The best international honour he got was winning silver at the 1912 Olympiad.

Then how about Sandor “Golden Head” Kocsis (1929 – 1979) of Hungary, a member of the legendary Mighty Magyars of the 1950s, together with Ferenc Puskas, Zoltan Czibor, Jozsef Bozsik and Nandor Hidegkuti.

He scored 75 goals for his country with only 68 caps – 1.1 goals per game. His greatest achievement was during the 1954 World Cup where Hungary were runners-up, and where Kocsis scored 11 goals – including two hattricks – for an average of 2.2 goals in a single World Cup finals competition – still unequaled more than 50 years later.

Still, I think Gerd Muller (b. 1945) of Germany is the greatest football striker at international level who ever lived. Sure, he looks more like a nuclear scientist nowadays but…

… together with Nielsen and Kocsis, Muller is one of only 3 players, among those who’ve scored 50 or more goals for their country, to have scored more goals than received caps. He got 62 caps, yet scored 68 goals – average 1.1 goals per game, same as Kocsis, including 10 goals at the 1970 World Cup, which Germany did not win. But win they did in 1974, even though Muller scored fewer i.e. 4 goals.

So Muller is a World Cup winner, scored 68 goals in 62 international games, including 14 in two World Cups – and most importantly scoring in the final, the winning goal no less – he truly is the greatest football striker who ever lived.

If ever someone deserves personalized footballs, it would be Muller.

Popularity: 1% [?]

We’ve seen it being used as a marketing device everywhere. Pretty girls has been posing suggestively, scantily clad next to anything from cars to chainsaws.

But this tops everything I have ever seen.

Sex is even used to sell coffins!

Presenting… Italian coffin (and anything funeral-related, including urns and funeral art) maker Cofanifunebri’s 2008 calendar.

This was the calendar for January 2008:

No contest, this is the sexiest coffin calendar ever, but if somehow you still got turned on by that, probably even a testosterone cream won’t be able to help.

In fact, they have been producing such calendars since 2003!

The rest of the series used to be available at wauifekt.com.

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Vu Van Tanh, 50 of Vietnam was apparently a soldier in 1978. He was shot while on duty in neighbouring Cambodia that year, and caused a 1-inch long AR15 bullet to be stuck in his lung.

It did not cause him any discomfort for a long time.

Still, Vu, now a farmer, wanted to remove it “a long time ago”, but could not afford the cost.

But then it caused him fever and breathing difficulties. It was then that he decided that enough was enough and sought help.

So, 30 years later in 2007, doctors at Thanh Hoa hospital removed the bullet, for free, after a 3-hour operation, then showed it to him. It was already rusty.

The patient was fine and was sent home.

Vu might be all skin and bones after his ordeal, but I bet bullets are not in the list of fat burners in apidexin reviews…

Source
Yahoo! News, 24 Dec 2007

Popularity: 1% [?]

Some time ago I wrote about the commonly held view that Queen’s Live Aid set in 1985 is the greatest live rock performance of all time, but after watching for the first time Jimi Hendrix’s set at the Monterey Pop Festival in June 1967, I think Jimi at least equalled Freddie in terms of sheer entertainment value.

The Monterey Pop Festival is considered important in rock history, not least because it’s the precursor to the legendary Woodstock festival held 2 years later, where Hendrix headlined.

But, if not for his legendary performance at Monterey, his first-ever American show, he might not have made such an impact in the USA.

At Monterey, the 24-year old Hendrix’s set was 45 minutes long: a very fast arrangement of Howlin’ Wolf’s 1965 R&B hit Killing Floor, then an equally lively rendition of B.B. King’s 1964 R&B hit Rock Me Baby, Tim Rose’s Hey Joe and Bob Dylan’s 1965 Pop hit Like a Rolling Stone. The set ended with The Troggs Wild Thing, and Hendrix’s iconic act of burning his guitar on stage, then smashing it to bits and tossing pieces out to the delirious crowd who were watching Hendrix’s first-ever American show.

Watch how Hendrix performed “Wild Thing” in the following video: 40 years on, I think it’s still an incredible performance; for those wannabe rock stars, watch and learn from the master:

And if you looked closely enough, it would seem that the guitar could’ve easily slipped from his grasp when he was turning around – it could’ve hit anybody – probably that time not everybody had signed up for at least a whole life insurance policy yet!

Popularity: 2% [?]

The following toilet signs used to be at McGuire’s Irish Pub in Pensacola, Florida. A pub being a pub, alcohol is sure to be served. What if you’re new there, had a few drinks and felt an urgent nature call? Which door would you choose?

It had been there for many years and General Manager Billy Martin explained it as follows: “it’s all in good fun. We’re not trying to be malicious. It’s an Irish joke kind of thing.” Yeah, and probably quite effective fat burners too – I imagine there’d be fistcuffs or hurried walks on a daily basis.

However, in May 2007, the signs were taken off, by order of the Florida Department of Business and Professional Regulation, for “lack of signage properly designating bathrooms.”

If McGuire’s did not take it off, closure was threatened.

The issue came to fore when someone filed a complaint, that “a college-age man walked in on his 15-year-old daughter” and that “his daughter was embarrassed and left the restaurant crying.”

However, thousands of pub patrons have signed a petition, demanding that the sings are put back.

Source
Northwest Florida Daily News, 16 May 2007

Popularity: 1% [?]